More tea vicar

The rollercoaster of being unemployed has hit a few curves this week.  I have been rejected for a position at a local company that I had been pretty hopeful about.  I am well qualified for the role, it offered a good salary, a great location and a really good employer.  It just seems that it was not to be and that hit me quite hard.

Then I had an interview with a company I’ve been talking with for a few months.  I don’t know if this particular position will pan out but we got on well and my CV is being passed around.  And a meeting is planned with another company who are looking for a contract person, to do what I do.  That would be a great opportunity, but it still has to be won.

Then, the merest glimmer of hope on the horizon for me personally.  A friend is setting up their own business and asked for some help with their website; SEO, content review and all that entails.  It will be a free service but one that my brain desperately needs to get itself wrapped around.

So much so that this afternoon whilst reading, editing and researching, my tea went cold.  Which tells me more than you can imagine.

I know what you did last summer

“What have you been doing since you were made redundant?”

It’s a succinct and powerful question to which the answer should never be “Sitting around drinking coffee and watching Jeremy Kyle.”.  Fortunately, only half of that answer is true and, I can faithfully say, I have never voluntarily watched Jeremy Kyle (surely it doesn’t count that it was being broadcast in the plumbers merchants this morning next to the counter?).

I have undertaken some voluntary work, I have run, I have had a couple of short holidays, I have read a significant number of books, virtually all of which are totally unmemorable.  I have applied for jobs, I have attended interviews, I have sat on trains to get to interviews (which takes up an interminable amount of time in itself). I have baked, I have cooked, I have cleaned and considered my future.  I haven’t as it happens, done any gardening, because that’s not my domain, but I have enjoyed the fruits of his labour.

I did, finally, relax over the summer and gave myself a break and, apart from a couple of interviews and one or two applications, I did pretty much take the summer off.  After all, that old adage is true – no one is going to wish they’d worked more on their death bed.

It has meant that I’ve spent time with the kids, naturally spending more time chauffeuring them to their friends’ houses, town, station, shops, dinner, clubs, activities and all the other social accompaniments to being a 21st century teenager than anything else, but also had time to speak with them and, it has to be said, enjoy their company.   When they could get up out of bed.

But tomorrow, they go back to school.

So, what’s next?  Well, I (almost certainly) have an interview this week, I’ve applied for a couple of jobs and I have a some interviews to chase or follow up on.  But maybe I need to take a leaf out of my summer-self’s book and be less tough on me and learn to enjoy my own company?

Guilt edged

As my friend most eloquently notes, I ought to be working.  I’m not currently working because, despite several millennia spent applying for, chasing and wishing for a new one, jobs are currently proving to be a little elusive.

I’ve had some more interviews which is always reassuring but, as of now, they’re not translating into offers or contracts.  There is more than one that I’m keeping my fingers firmly crossed for, because they both really appeal.  I hope it’s mutual.

However, that leaves me with the constant dilemma of, what should I do with my time?  Unlike the same friend, I don’t have a deadline to work to.  If you haven’t read his story,  come September he’s slinking back into the mire of student life to further qualify himself to watch daytime TV and stand atop his soapbox in the pub on a Friday evening.  I shall look forward to further opportunities to enjoy at least one of those with him.  Daytime TV isn’t it.

But, I digress.  I don’t have that luxury, for now.  I can’t say “OK, you have one week, two weeks, a few day to make the most of this free time so shut down your PC and get out there and just enjoy it!”  I have spent some time with the kids, my husband or by myself but, during the working week, it still feels like I’m playing hookie and will get caught and reprimanded for that sort of slovenly behaviour.

Or worse, I won’t be available when the job that’s been hunting me down comes knocking and I miss out – even though, should that situation arise, I’m more than certain that employer would wait a few hours for my return.

As of right now, I have a cheque to pay into the bank and a couple of items to return to a store in town.  But I’m putting it off, just in case.

I have a stack of books to read and downloads to review, I have music to listen to and cakes to bake.  Instead I sit here scrolling through recruitment sites, calling agencies and chasing interviews.

I just have to remind myself, as I am constantly reminded by friends, that something will happen eventually.

Feast or famine?

I haven’t had an interview for over a month.  I have continued to apply, to email, to call; to send out my CV to make contact and to try to get a job.  But my calendar has remained uniformly bereft of appointments for opportunities for possible employment.

And then chasing one possibility creates an actual meeting and then another application leads to a recruiter asking if I’m available and a friend of a friend says, hey, call Lisa and they do and suddenly I have two face to face and one telephone interview in three days.

This is the third time in the past few months that this situation has arisen.   It seems that the universe can’t allow me to spread them out evenly so I have plenty of time to prepare remain calm and, instead, just wants to see how I perform under pressure.  Which normally is pretty well but today is giving me butterflies.

And the band played on

I received a job rejection last week.  Nothing particularly unusual in that, other than most job applications barely elicit an acknowledgement of receipt let alone a rejection (and almost without fail not an invitation for interview).  For some reason, that one left me particularly upset.

It wasn’t a role I was ideally suited or qualified for, although I do have many of the required skills and experience.  It wasn’t a role I was over qualified nor, as it happens, under qualified for but the location was perfect, the salary verging on generous and the opportunity something to get my teeth into.

And it bothered me.

Another role that I was recommended for by a friend of a friend and, as it happens, would have been an ideal candidate for I won’t be invited to interview for because the location is all wrong (all wrong for just about everyone as it happens), but that one left me shrugging my shoulders rather than experiencing a range of negative emotions.

Why is it that sometimes we can be thus affected for no apparent reason and another time barely seem to notice?

To date I have applied for something in the region of 150 roles. I’ve had six 1st interviews, two 2nd interviews and a handful of rejections. Hopefully I’m improving my odds and, eventually, something has to stick.

And now for something….

So, my friend and fellow writer of words Dom has, in not so many words, been grateful for my editing and pedantic skills with words and grammar.  In my current situation of not being able to find anyone willing to be grateful enough to pay for my skills, it’s useful to know that they’re not entirely redundant.

I have been fortunate enough this week to have achieved more interviews and, with much luck and not a little decent planning, the ability to schedule three on the same day not a million miles from each other.

Whilst the stress of interviews in themselves is usually enough to put people off, I am, now, becoming somewhat more relaxed about the whole process.  This is useful for me (fewer sleepless nights) but on the other hand perhaps doesn’t necessarily give me the necessary ‘edge’ that someone in my position might need?

One, with a reputable head-hunter, was a great forum for unbiased feedback as well as the prerequisite discussion about the role at hand.  He was impressed by my CV, my manner and presentation but gave me some useful pointers to be taken into account when facing an actual client.

I was, of course, grateful and will take his comments on board and to heart when the opportunity arises but for the previous, proper interview with an actual employer with whom I got on like the proverbial house-on-fire.  Perhaps because she was relaxed, made me coffee, chatted about the weather and he was wearing a pin-striped suit and I felt not a little intimidated given the venue and surroundings.  Probably more my problem then his but my need to develop more adaptability at different levels might need some work.

In the meantime, how does someone create worth with their time when they’re not being paid? It’s difficult, I have to admit.  I have cleaned tidied, exercised to within an inch of my life and possibly a little bit beyond (with injuries to show for it), I have gone though cupboards and wardrobes and spent more than enough time for this year ‘eBaying’ the remnants of what seems like another life.

If only they had the same value to the purchasers as they have done to me through their time in the house.  At least, I suppose, it’s better than landfill and I’ve learned some more tricks of the trade which may convert to a more salable me when the right job comes along.